Why Do Good Things Happen to Bad People?

I know you just did a double take and yes, to confirm you're not cray or severely dyslexic, I turned that around on purpose.

I happen to know for a fact that every single one of you reading this was at one point an elementary aged child and I happen to know for a greater fact that every single one of you has stomped your foot and exclaimed with all the passion and fervor that your 3rd grade mind could muster, 'IT'S NOT FAIR'. Except it was probably more like, 'It's NOT Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaair.

Am I right? You know I'm right. In fact, if we were all to be truthful about it, we probably used that expression WAY past third grade, I mean, I think I might have pulled it out of my sleeve all the way into 6th or Senior year of college AT LEAST. Wait, I didn't make it to Senior year of college (which totally wasn't fair by the way) so more like.....yesterday. Yeah, I think I might have used it yesterday. But I've totally matured. I'm never using that expression again.

And true to form, as if they all signed a mutual agreement about what the appropriate response would be when we were born, our parents or whatever adult in our lives that happened to be present when they passed around the 'Life is Not Fair Response contract', would immediately and without sorrow, remorse or even an ounce of sympathy, respond just as passionately with "No one ever said life was fair, tsk, tsk." Or if your parents were REALLY creative like my mom was, you might have heard something more existential, like, "It IS fair. I COULD make you windex all fifty of the windows in this house." (That usually did the trick.)

Regardless of how it went in your house, we were all born into this world without wasting much time before believing the fallacy that we are inherently awesome, wonderful, good, nice, decent, civil, awesome, loving, giving, awesome people and that because we are awesome, wonderful, good, nice, decent, civil, awesome, loving, giving, awesome people nothing bad SHOULD ever happen to us. And when it does, it's a personal affront to our awesomeness.

So we trudge through the muck and mire of the unfairness of life; crying, whining, wringing our hands, screaming 'IT'S NOT FAIR' in a million subtle and not so subtle ways and blaming everyone and everything that happens to come across our path for it. We use it as an excuse to hate our parents, our friends, our selves, our teachers, our preachers, the President, our spouses, our bosses, our children, our neighbors and everyone else. We blame our laziness, selfishness, meanness, spitefulness, uglyness, hatefulness, and general lack of creativity and resourcefulness on it. We use it as an excuse to feel justified in not believing in others, in love, and in God. I'm sure you've heard the classic, "If God was REALLY good, bad things wouldn't happen to good people."

And I must admit, I've elbowed my way in there with the best of them; furrowing my brow, shaking my  heavenward pointed fist and demanding some reasonable answers. But, as they say, it's all about perspective, yes? Because I wonder what would happen if instead of taking the million good things for granted and throwing a two year old tantrum about the 7 bad things that have happened, we paused to realize that ONLY 7 bad things have happened when it could have been a million. Which, in all actuality, we probably deserved more than the million good things that were given instead.

I heard someone, somewhere, sometime define grace as 'giving someone something they don't deserve' but what hit me square between the eyes was mercy, in that same sentence, being defined as 'not giving someone something they TOTALLY deserve'. (Like that driver that cut you off the other day. You know what you were thinking. I was thinking it too.)

Because the truth is, we're NOT awesome. Or wonderful or nice or giving or loving or awesome. And if we were to REALLY be given what we deserve, it would be a terrible, horrible death, over and over again.

So. I'm reframing this timeless question. And here's a few personal reasons why.

1. After my ectopic pregnancy in 2010, there was a slim to none chance that Andis and I could ever expect to get pregnant on our own without help. But we DID! We got pregnant! On our own without hormones or doctors or needles, just good ol' fashion love! Which means we can get pregnant AGAIN! 

2. We got an infection in the placenta and the only solution to that infection was the baby had to go. If my body had not done what it did, we could have been faced with the impossible decision to either abort our child OR we could have continued in the pregnancy and at best I would have ended up with no child AND a hysterectomy or Andis would have ended up with no child and no wife.

3. We lost our dog Jackson six months ago almost as suddenly as we lost our child but if we had not experienced that, I feel confident that we would not be handling this grief with such success, unity and compassion for each other.

So the new question is, WHY do GOOD things happen to BAD people? Your answer may be different than mine, but I believe it's because we were created by an amazingly loving and passionate God whose commitment is to 'never leave nor forsake us'....anytime, ever, but definitely in the midst of pain....even if His nature and our choice requires Him to allow it in the first place.

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

So, keep on throwing your two year old tantrums and raising your tiny little fists to the sky if you must, but just know that Option B is available and it's pretty dang reasonable.